what the hell happened to the ricky lake show?

Tastes like banana boat...

I'M COMPULSIVELY LOOKING AT THE CLOCK TODAY...I'm not reading the time I'm just looking at the clock. As if I'm reassuring myself. Time is there and it's moving.

I'M DISENCHANTED WITH CINGULAR! THEY STOLE AN HOUR AND A HALF OF MY LIFE AND I WANT IT BACK. DAMN IT...

naaaanell dinos...

he started school this week. i'm so proud.
she's such a dork!

GRRRRRRR!

MISS CLEO IS GAY...

OH MY BLADDER...

o.k. i learned something important today... 6 cups of coffee is way too much for my bladder to handle. i've peed 5 1/2 times today. i had to stop mid piss earlier. a stupid client came in. that didn't make my bladder happy. i should go buy some depends so i can just sit here and piss myself.

WHOA!

One of my customers just walked in here. Not a big deal until I caught a whiff... She must have been hot boxing it in the van she came out of. She smelt like pure GANJA! I kind of miss having the smell wake me up in the morning. I remember being warned not to drink the tea in the coffee pot on a few occasions.

thank goodness for designated drivers

the mine shaft, brit pub and falcon...






when we finished the night we walked back to the cars... everytime i took a step the earth would shake.

by ninny

smoking area at the mine shaft. more like a smoking hall...

my weakness

French fries. Shhhhhh don't tell my dr. i've been eating them she'll kick my but. i heart potatoes...

we're the biggest pair of nerds you'll ever meet...

and that's ok

coffee anyone?

i remember when this thing had chicken soup coming out of the same tube.

boba...FLUFFY BUNNY!!!!!!!!!!

Barry Adamson + David Lynch= SPECTACULAR!

ewww!

what if woody allen and gary busey gave birth to a child?

why the hell am i still up?

taken at 5:20 this morning. how i was feeling "it's grrrrrrrrr early..... stupid airport! i heart my ubu!"

I fucking Q

a couple of months ago i took my first iq test ever. i scored a 79. which is almost hindered. most people would have been upset at those results and taken the test immediately again. not me i was ecstatic. i was using it to my advantage. things like "oh it ok i'm just a little slow" were coming out of my mouth. i was also using it as an "advantage" at work... i was having fun with it. then today i saw this puzzle and i clicked on it then all of a sudden i was completing an iq test. well... i'm not hindered... which makes me sad i can't eat sand at the park with the other kids anymore....daaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!

conversations in the dark

we held a belated birthday gathering for ubu sunday night. i love having guests over. the strangest conversations are held around this table. i woke up with such a hang over. it was well worth it.

gary busey is frightening

WHAT'S THAT TINGLE FEELING?

SO I HAVEN'T BEEN FEELING WELL. I'VE BEEN HAVING THESE SHOCK LIKE THINGS PASS THROUGH MY SKULL. I CAN FEEL THEM PASS THROUGH MY BRAIN. IT FEELS LIKE ELECTRICITY GOING THROUGH MY BRAIN. IT'S REALLY NEAT AND TERRIFYING AT THE SAME TIME. WHEN IT GETS TO THE BACK OF MY SKULL IT DISSIPATES AND IT'S ALL DONE. IT'S ONLY PAINFUL WHEN IF STARTS THEN I GET A LITTLE LETHARGIC. THEN POOF I'M OK. MY DR. SAID THAT'S NORMAL IF YOUR 60... BUT SINCE I'M NOT 60 SHE WANTS ME TO GET MY HEAD SCANNED. I'VE REFUSED. I TOLD HER IT WAS JUST PROBABLY WORK RELATED STRESS. I'M ACTUALLY STILL IN MY OFFICE RIGHT NOW. I CLOCKED OUT MORE THEN AN HOUR AGO. BUT I'M STILL WORKING I THINK I'VE DONE EVERYTHING TWICE TODAY. SO I MIGHT ACTUALLY LEAVE MY OFFICE. I HAVE TO LEARN HOW TO STOP AND LEAVE THE OFFICE...

I dislike pandas greatly...

Yet another reason why I HATE PANDAS!
The fact of the matter is they don't even want to live. Just look at this....

This panda is obviously suicidal. He's about to take his own life. Yet there will be someone out there yelling "oh cute little bear"... My point is; they aren't willing to save themselves why the hell are we trying to save a species which only eats bamboo, comes in to estrus only once a year and then rolls over it's baby? Millions of dollars have been wasted on pandas. I say let them go the way of the DODO. Stupid flightless birds, if they wanted to live they'd evolve like the yummy chicken. Please note that chickens are also flightless birds that seem to be alive. All I'm saying is
I FUCKING HATE PANDAS!
Having worked for the zoological society of San Diego my have a lot to do with my hatred for pandas. Do you know what's it's like to go to work and people asking you stupid questions about pandas? This is all i heard for three years "Oooo panda panda panda. Panda this panda that. and then the panda peed himself and it was so cute!" All pandas do it lay around and eat bamboo. I’m sorry but if you’re naked you've got to be more interesting then that. Pandas are one boring disappointment.

woody allen must die!

boba and burgers

like most financial institutions my office was closed today. i had an extra day to burn. what did i do today you ask????? well coconuts, baby hercules and i drove around in my toaster looking for some fun. nothing like boba, burgers, boomers and the 99 cent store.
i was a big spender at the swamp meet this weekend i spent 8 buck on two pet ID tags for myself. i personalized them of course. the black one has a "MEOW!" rather then a GRRR!. the gentleman who engraved them chuckled in amusement while he was performing his duties. i'm glad i can make people smile over simple things.
at least when i get lost now i can look at my wrist and know who i am. i hope i get alzheimer soon... so i can put these things to use...

"watermelon steals the sheet"

i finally painted something... i thought i was painting a representation of my honeybucket stealing the cover. apparently it's a watermelon to her... and a flower to my ubu.... so i guess it's a watermelon stealing my sheets in the middle of the night.

MEXITONE BEAN#DJ123

i decided i'm pantone #150 hmmm..... maybe i'm more of a 1485....